Why our society is obsessed with Sex

Haven't you been questioning why people were so obsessed with Sex above all in this environment where over-consumption prone our lives ?

Normally, in my opinion, sexual intercourse should be one of the most exciting experiences one can have.

It could be beautiful as well : through the sexual act, two persons can experience ecstatic moments of Love - moments everyone is deep down thirsty for. In those moments, you experience sacred heights of pure bliss and relaxation.

Why then, in our culture where sex is considered a priority in life, most seem to experience NO such beautiful moments?

Why are people obsessed with sex, wanting to have more and more of it, without ever being satisfied ?

Why the constant search for more sexual gratification and the resulting experience of emotional discontentment ? 

In order to answer those questions, I think we first need to take a look at the culture we are living in how it affects the way people relate to one another.

With the means of advances modern technology, it seems that we humans are more connected than  ever before. The internet especially has helped us create a global communication network where in a split of a second we can share ideas and interact with others from any part of our planet.

And yet, it seems that we are more hungry for connection than ever before.

No matter how many online friends or followers we have on social media, most feel alienated.

That’s because online relationships are only skin-deep, unable to provide us with a true sense of intimacy and bonding. Text messages can’t substitue for in-person conversations, emoticons cannot substitue for body language expression and cybersex can’t substitue for physical contact.

Also, when using dating apps, sometimes, it’s just about a matter of ego, about boosting your own self. Yeah, isn’t it pleasing when someone pretty hot, good-looking like you? But have you questioned why? Because you think you are as « good looking » as this person. Because you think, man, I’m worth it and then you get to boast about it! It feels like a kind of reward. But the truth is that you don’t really need this to feel self-sufficient.

At the same time, a lot of people use Sex because they have a hard time opening their hearts to others and forming intimate relationships, afraid that they might be hurt by them. 

To avoid that, they’ve created tall, thick walls around their hearts to protect themselves from any possible danger. And although the walls might prevent them from hurting others and being hurt, they also prevent them from loving others and being loved.

We are living in a consumption-driven economy system where people are constantly feeling the pressure to buy products and services in order to keep the money moving in the economy.

This pressure is being to a great extent enhances by the ADVERTISING INDUSTRY.

How, by constantly trying to convince us that buying stuff is the solution to all of our problems. For example, if you feel lonely and unloved, advertisements are selling you products or services that will make you feel more confident, beautiful and attractive to others.

In fact, most advertisements exploit our inherent need for social connection or Ego gratification.

That’s why you see Sex is being sold to us all the time : to promise the reward of connection or ego-boosting.

Sex is being sold everywhere. In the movies we watch. In the magazines we read. In the clothes we wear.

Day in and day out we are bombarded with countless sexual messages.

Not surprisingly, people have become obsessed with Sex, believing that it’s the only thing that truly matters in Life. And guess what ? We are followers so we tend to think that multiplying Sexual intercourse is what will make us feel like a winner (men would use it as a proof of their virility, women as a proof of their independence & experience)

But regardless of how many sexual acts and love stories we consume, we still feel empty inside and thirsty for more, because none of those things can provide us with what we truly long for: a genuine interaction, connection to people or the belief that we are already worthy with everything we are.

Even the sexual act itself is not enough to quench our thirst. The genitalia might rub against one another, but when there’s no friction between two people’s hearts or envy, the spark of love cannot be ignited.

Love is so much more than bed gymnastics and the temporary pleasure that is derived from the short-lived experience of physical orgasm.

Hence people’s obsession with Sex : despite the amount of Sex we have, most are never satisfied and desire more of it, because Sex in itself is not what we truly want.

What we deep down desire is to love and be loved, create connection and Sex cannot substitute for that.

Sex can provide only a momentary illusion of Love by helping bring two bodies together, but it does not have the power to bring together two hearts that are distanced from one another.

When two hearts are united, however, sex takes a totally different form - it becomes an expression of Love.
Through Sex, two lovers can communicate their being with body and soul - that is, with the totality of their being. It should be a perfect way to relax together and share goods feelings.

Lost in the hug of the beloved, the self, in a sense, dies. The sparkling flame of Love in the heart, along with the intense pleasure of the sexual act, leave no space for the ego.

When in Love, the mind with its past and future, worries and concerns, dissolves. And that’s precisely what Love is : the extinction of the self - that is, the disappearance of the boundaries between the I and you - the sense of belonging to a greater whole whose depths we can’t fathom.

When this happens, we shine our brightest and nothing is lacking :  we feel complete and are not needy of anything. 

Desires and expectations stop torturing the mind and we accept Life as it is.

As long as there’s no love between two partners, Sex cannot be anything more than an egoistic act.

Partners will be trying to control and exploit one another - to turn another into their sexual objects solely for their personal gratification.

Unconsciously, all they want to get out of Sex is Love (I mean Love in all ways that is to say, love of yourself -confidence through the eyes of others- and this is particularly true for Women, Love from your partner etc.), but Love can’t be forced or demanded.

Mistaking Sex for Love, and wanting to quench their thirst for Loving connection through it, they become obsessed with having more and more Sex, not realizing that they are trying to drink from an empty cup…




Sex, in itself, should be a great experience for sharing moments of relaxation but our society has turned it into evil or as a product for personal reward (where only ego prevails) thus, it could be one of the reasons why, it turns out as a complete mess.